ok! so a brief potted history.... been with Orange since it was called freeserve dial-up and 18 months ago moved my mobile-phone to take advantage of the broadband tie in (£35 mobile contract = free broadband). Paid, like some other poor bugger I was reading about earlier on this great site, £5 for an enhanced connection of 8 meg. That has never materialised in last 18 months - and I have to tell the same old story of appalling reliability, worse connection and indescribable customer service.

Anyhoo, decided now that my mobile contract is up in June, to move to the "UK's No1" o2 (now Sky) for broadband.

Well if I could get my MAC code I would!!!

My diary so far, good gentlefolk.

19th May 08. Day1. 19.23: You want to leave Orange? How can this be?? A cheaper and better service??? Are YOU SURE??? Oh yes I AM sure. Uh-oh... The system that generates MAC codes is down so please could you ring back tomorrow? Hell - yes I can, I'm liberating myself and sometimes that takes time. Enjoyable, beautiful, and extendable time.

20th May 08. Day2. 20.30: No problem Sir, I'll put you through to the people who can generate the code for you. Why thank-you nice Orange person. Hello? Person no2? Please can I have my MAC code? Oh...You have to put me through to someone else? This is Person No3 - The person who generates the MAC code? You're going to transfer me now?? Well... ok....... Tell you what Orange - I'll hang on for 45minutes @ 5ppm to listen music that sounds so ear-killingly badly-recorded that I wish my telephone had a 6 inch spike to rip out my eardrum. Goddammit - I've had to pop out to pick up my daughter from drama after 20mins and my very good lady has taken on the call. Jesus, who recorded that music? Hello?? What??? NO, I'm not the account holder. I am his good lady. You can't talk to me even though you already kept us hanging on for 20 mins and have already asked for the 2nd and 4th letters of the password? HE had to pop out on daughhterly-duties. Listen dude - I live here, have an email address with you, I share a bed with the account holder. Not good enough??. Ok. He'll call back later.

20th May 08. Day2. 21.45: Hello sir. MAC code? Hold on for 5 minutes please whilst I make you feel motion-sick with my hi-fidelity music. Yes well there is a problem with your MAC code. Oh, what's that then? Well, when you cancelled your mobile contract they should have sent us a memo telling us to give you a MAC code. They should have emailed you as well. A memo? Yes sir a memo. To whom? To us sir. But why would they know I won't be taking Orange broadband any more? Well sir, your broadband is free with your mobile contract. You'll have to ring them.

20th May 08. Day2. 21.55. Hellllooo sir. You've cancelled your mobile contract and you want a MAC code for your broadband? Well, we have no record of you terminating your mobile contract. And the broadband team closes at ten but I will try and hurry your call through to get your MAC address. Why is it you want to leave us??? Really sir, I am so sorry to hear that your experience with Orange broadband hasn't been so good. Still. Oh no the broadband team has closed now. Tell you what, I will call you back at MIDDAY tomorrow with the details you require. SHOCK! YOU will call ME back??

--TBC! Tomorrow 21st May 08. Tune in for more rock'n'roll (ramones fans only)